Weekend Wrap-up: Bikini Suits, Spicing up the house, and Sundays

Thursday: I was able to get a few extra hours in at my job to make some $$$. After an amazing lifting session, I headed to work and cut up fruit (the usual). Afterwards I went back into the gym for my second round of cardio and just wasn’t feeling it.

Does anyone else ever do 2-a-days and just hate the second session?

I think it’s because there are way too many people there for my liking at 3-5pm that I just can’t get in the mood to workout!

20160312_210448917_iOSFriday: Super busy Friday! I usually never work fridays at the grocery store but I volunteered to help out a day shift, which entirely threw my day off! I got to the gym at my usual 3:45AM time, then had a client at 7:30, and then had to be at work at 10. A lot of running around, but I did manage to have a successful friday. MY BIKINI CAME IN! Smile And even better….it fit! Now only if my abs could pop out any day now I would be happy Smile Good thing my second show isn’t until next month, I still have time to grind and kill it on stage. I need to relax and understand that this whole bikini competition thing is a learning process—I won’t master this all in one day (or one show). Granted, I’m doing everything on my own with my coach, it’s tough not having a huge support system but luckily I found some women at the gym who have given TONS of advice to get me through prep and walk me through the process.


Saturday: work work work! Usually my weekends only consist of work, but lately I’ve felt overworked—not just with a job, but in LIFE. I feel like my anxiety is getting a bit out of control; feeling at a loss of time and that I don’t have enough time is something I constantly say I will work on, but still struggle everyday on it. I’ve been seriously feeling depressed lately (and I dislike using that word because I know it is a true illness that I don’t want to misuse) but I really have been feeling pretty low. Here are some of the things ive been trying to do that really have been helping me:

  • adding bright colors to my apartment
  • reorganizing my room/apartment
  • listening to peppy music each morning
  • starting my day at the gym
  • buying flowers and adding that to my house


Personally, I just think I need more color in the environment I live in. Spicing up the house with color REALLY affects my mood, for the better. Try it out! I even was productive and went to walmart and returned some things, picked up photos for my room AND bought a bright colored bedspread!


Sunday: An easy day at the gym this AM: cardio + some chest and bis. My chest is feeling a lot better than it has been; straining/overtraining is the worst! Especially chest—you use that muscle in nearly everything you do! Tonight will just consist of a nice relaxing bikeride for some fun cardio + some homework on the porch. Let’s hope the weather stays relatively nice. It’s only 6:30AM and I hear the birds chirping already.


Make today a good day!


Protein Powder Cookie Dough???

20160222_130016114_iOSSometimes I am DYING for a sweet treat. And yes, there is absolutely nothing wrong with indulging on oreos (cinnamon  bun oreos = heaven!), a slice of cake, or maybe some Chex Mix muddy buddies actually. BUT who doesn’t want to indulge in a treat that not only TASTE delicious, but fuels their body right as well?? Probably my mom actually since she always tell me that she would rather eat the full fat delicious treat than some knock off ‘substitute for applesauce’ type of treat…..but that’s beside the point! My roommate Christyna and I got creative with Dymatize’s  Iso-100 whey protein in birthday cake flavor. As an undergraduate in the food and nutrition program, I was always fascinated by food substitutions and food science and making healthier alternatives to our favorite meals. Currently my diet is limited….and making and eating healthier meals is hard, but luckily my roommate’s diet isn’t as limited hehe. Here is what Christyna and I ended up doing:






  1. 1/2 cup of greek yogurt (we used Walmart brand vanilla)
  2. 1/4 cup of coconut flour
  3. 2 scoops of cake batter flavored protein powder
  4. as many sprinkles as you would like!

Mix all of those up and put it in the refridgerator and BAM! you have yourself a nice, creamy treat for whenever your sweet tooth is calling your name. Literally took us 5 minutes (and probably 15 minutes to take all of these photos). This is also great after a workout. Spread on top of a cinnamon raisin slice of bread and you get your carb + protein fix instantly!


Anyone else try concocting a delicious protein powder recipe?




Workout Wednesday

20160217_110004000_iOSDo you ever….

have those days where you know for a fact you completed everything but you are absolutely stressing out over NOTHING? That’s me on  a typical day, and that was definitely me yesterday. After being called off of work I laid in my bed all day at my laptop working on assignments, projects, research, my portfolio, my presentation, etc. I finished everything that “had” to be done but for some reason I could not get rid of that super anxious/stress vibe! I think it’s because it’s that girly time of the month and I’m at a lack of chocolate Sad smile  My roommate Christyna’s mom bought me swiss chocolate and all I want to do is dive into that ziplock bag of them!!! And this morning all I wanted to do was snoooooze! I wasn’t even tired, but I had to lay in my bed and talk to myself; stating how I needed to get up and kill my workout so I didn’t have to do it later. And killed it is exactly what I did:

Back and Tris/30 minutes of cardio. Coach wants me to do back bis AND tris, but combining all of those in a short 1.5 hour period was not happening this AM.


Workout for back and tris this AM:

  • medium grip lat pull down superset w/ cable rows
  • wide grip lat pull downs superset w/ tricep pulls (rope attachment)
  • the iso chest/back machine superset with tricep pulldowns (bar attachment)
  • single arm iso back superset with dips
  • skullcrushers superset with barbell tricep curls
  • rope attachment face pulls superset with seated rows
  • 30 minutes run/walk cardiooooo!

In regards to diet, I’ve been fairly good for how much of a carb queen I am Princess Counting down the weeks until I can eat my iHop cinnastack pancakes!

After freaking out and mentally stressing all day, I headed over to the IUP campus to present on eating disorders. Can’t wait until next week when I can do it again. Photographers from The Penn (the school paper) showed up, so that was a nice surprise. Afterwards I headed over to Shawn’s house because I seriously needed a venting session. Sometimes talking is the best medicine. Although I’ve spent most of my life using isolation as my source of “stress relief”, I find that surrounding myself with a person or even a few people can really be beneficial.

also it probably helped that Shawn bought cinnamon bun oreos yesterday and I totally stole half of one, no shame there though!! (Sorry coach!!)


On that note of spending time with people, after I come back from work today,  Lacey (figure competitor) and I have a nice coffee date planned. Girl time = always appreciated!! Especially from those who know exactly what you are going through.

Off to work!!


Way Back Wednesday

20160209_103519000_iOSSo as I prep for this eating disorder awareness program for next week, it has me thinking a lot about my past and where I’ve come from, and of course how far I’ve come. I’m supposed to tell my story at this event, which I definitely don’t oppose to since I think seeing others who are recovering is a great example to set and shows that there is hope. It’s just crazy looking back and seeing how much time I’ve wasted counting meaningless calories and stressing over the amount I can pinch around my waist. I’m not saying I don’t do to this day, because sometimes I find myself falling in that track again. When I’m nervous I always find myself pinching my waist, or if I’m out to dinner I can most likely guesstimate how much calories I’m eating and be nearly spot on. But I know the relapse symptoms, and I think that’s the best part about recovery—you learn. and although you may not be “cured” per say, you find a way to cope and live happily. I’m not afraid to eat anymore but there are certain things I know I am afraid of, such as drinking liquid calories. It sounds silly but it’s something I just can’t seem to shake.



Buttt on another note, I did manage to get my gym session in today & am preparing for a full day’s worth of work. Hospital for long term care today and then I have Health AWAREness training from 5-8pm, so I can’t forget to pack my dinner! They’re serving Turkey Chili but I am doing my best to stick with my prep diet so I can place in my shows. Prepping and bringing food can be tough because…FREE FOOD??? who wants to pass that up?? But when you have goals, and currently I do in regards to training/eating, you have to make exceptions.


Just two more months and I can eat that Cinnabon Cinnastack Pancake from IHopOpen-mouthed smile Can’t come soon enough!!


Management: What It Entails (and the rest of my friday)

20160205_142134000_iOSHoly meals!! We prepared, trudged through the snow, and delivered 103 meals to the staff at Indiana U of PA Campus! Full of love french toast, valentines day vanilla parfait, and cupids crunch mix all boxed up and sent out to the recepients. We even had some people email us asking what the recipe for the french toast was! Today Patrice and I were the managers in charge of the 103 orders with 9 other employees helping us delivers. What I learned about managing/management skills/what it entails to be a manager:

  1. It’s tough.
  2. You need to check. and double check.
  4. People are slackers; employees don’t care about the finish product. If you tell them to do a task, they will do the bare minimum (usually). So sometimes you really have to check up on your employees to ensure quality.
  5. Be loud. This definitely goes with communication. If you aren’t an upfront type of person, you’ll be eaten alive in the management world.
  6. Organization is critical….like you need to be on top of you sh*t. For real.


Anddd this all started at 4:00AM today when I woke up, showered, and got ready to start baking the french toast and preparing the packaging at 6:00am on campus. After a successful management experience, I headed to the gym on campus and that was beyond the worst experience EVER! good thing it was only cardio day. 30 minutes of cardio plus a little shoulder action and I needed t get out of there! The campus gym reminded me of how much I dislike people (hehe kidding!). As I was leaving the gym and heading to my doctor appointment (which ended up running an hour behind schedule….), I noticed a frat had a raffle table for winning a gift basket for “the special someone”. The men’s basket had an electric razer, some candy, protein powder, a DVD, and some other “guy” related objects. The women’s had a face mask, a girly DVD, nail polish, candies, and other “female” type products. It’s crazy how we really stereotype genders nowadays. I went up to the table and was like “what’s with the protein?” (typical me only seeing the protein) and they told me how it was a raffle basket “for your special man” and I was like mmm or myself HA. and walked away.

The rest of what I anticipated to be a slow, relaxing day ended up being jam packed with errands: car wash, returns to the store, and now blogging with a cup of coffee awaiting to get some paper work done with Roddy. Hopefully we don’t get too side tracked and start rambling about the latest nutrition gossip because I definitely need t get my mind on track and get some of my homework done.



Leg Day and Overworked

20160204_114758386_iOSYesterday was BEYOND the longest day of my life. After my super early morning gym session, I went to work and was there only 8-1:30pm since the dietitian had to leave for personal reasons. After that I headed to the grocery store which was PACKED, went home to eat (I was starving all day….like it was unexplainable. I’ve never been that famished before!!) and attempted to cure my insane headache which failed miserably. I was only home for an hour before I had to leave t go back to the store and purchase 250$ worth of food for the event we are holding tomorrow. The afternoon seemed to have been going well. I ran into Roddy’s father and that always makes my day. Talking to him always puts me in a pleasant mood!

After Patrice and I purchased the food for the french toast bake, yogurt parfaits, and trail mix, we had to pre some of it. We thought it would only take a few hours but we were there 4-10pm….

and of course I would lose my car key…and find in 3 minutes later but still! The fact that it set me back three minutes was miserable. The hard work we put into half of the prep last night was worth it. I’ll post the recipes after we finalize if they are a hit with the staff or not Winking smile

I still managed to wake up at 3AM, hit the gym, and come home and get ready for work. But because of my late night yesterday I didn’t have time to prep my chicken for today….so I did that this morning while doing the following:

my hair

the dishes

taking out the trash for trash day

eating my oatmeal

andddd checking my emails. Pro multi-tasker if you ask me!

Because we did so much of the prep yesterday, today should be short and simple: prep the french toast and let it soak overnight and fill the yogurt containers. Should be in and out easily. Well, let’s hope.


20160204_014019000_iOSToday’s 3:30AM workout: 30 minutes of cardio, Abs, and legs. I’ll probably head back in later to finish up some legs because I was a little rushed, but I feel fairly content with everything I put in this morning. I truly enjoy when no one is at the gym, I feel better squatting that way hehe.

Problem: Aside from sodium and dairy, what can cause you (or someone you know) to bloat? I woke up and felt excessively bloated, full, and uncomfortable and CANNOT put my finger on it!


Off to work at the hospital! wish me luck with tonight’s events!


Ps: making this trail mix with fancy bags took us four hours….lets hope people appreciate them!!


Sicknesses & Show Shoes

20160201_162357000_iOSSo I sit here. in my bed, on a Monday morning due to the fact that my temperature is sky rocketing to the 100’s! What drives me bananas is that I was having a great time at work and yesterday morning and just as I left for the gym I started to feel sooo fatigued. I thought I was just being a baby since it was lef day, but when I finally gave up and went home at 12:30 I stayed in bed until the rest of the evening. I cancelled all my meetings and attempted to drink fluids but I couldn’t stomach a single thing! I’m usually the girl who will devour anything, but yesterday my stomach was not having it…I couldn’t even stomach coffee!! The funny part was that I went to sleep at 7pm and woke up to use the bathroom, thinking it was probably 2AM but it was only 8:30PM haha. The only thing I actually enjoy about waking up in the middle of the night is looking at the clock and seeing that I have so much more time to sleep.


Today I have all day since I called off of my new internshipSad smile  I feel extremely bad about it but I know I couldn’t be working in a hospital around patients with a fever! Listening to your body is important…it sucks, but it’s so important! That being said, chances are I should take a rest day today depending on how I feel around dinner time.


On a better note, my competition shoes came in yesterday!! They actually FIT and I am inlove with them!! 5 inches and sparkles (brand = fabulicious hehe) = watch out girls here I come!! Let’s hope my eating habits get back on track and I am show ready by March!


Another review I want to make is of MusclePharm’s Assult in Lemon Lime: The taste? Awful. I love lemon lime but I could not drink this premade peworkout drink. My boss compared it to “leprechaun piss” haha! The effect? A little bit of the jitters (2g of beta alanine) but overall not what I was expecting. Would I purchase again? No thanks, that taste really was offputting!


My Biggest Fear: Spontaneity

20160131_112647912_iOSSpontaneity: something I don’t really do too well. I’m that nit picky super planner that needs to know EVERYTHING down to the time, date, central location, what we’re all wearing type of girl, and I personally have found that to be an unattractive quality. A bad quality? Not so much, but it can really get in my way (and I’m speaking from personal experience, not as a fact for everyone) of having fun. I tend to turn down last minute invites to the bar, or to a get together, or just a coffee date because it wasn’t “in my schedule”. But yesterday wasn’t the case. Usually my 8.5 hour shifts turn into 5 hour shifts because of the lack of work…but I could not keep up with yesterdays orders! From veggie tray call ins, to fruit platters, to BOGO on mixed  fruit, I was going crazy! Plus it didn’t help that my bosses asked for other silly things of me that THEY could have done. Luckily I have one co worker who is always offering to help me: shout out to you Ashlee!!

Anyways as 2pm hit I received a message from an old friend who I haven’t spoke to in months with the following question: are you free for an adventure? Immediately I went into panic mode.

Tabitha you have to go to the gym at 3pm, that was your plan. (it was my off day but I wanted to run). You’re free after so go do it after, you’re fine.

I said I was free.

He said: 3:15pm ?

I could have made it for 3:15, and that would have made my anxiety rise a little by having to shift my gym schedule around, but I was willing to make it work.

Done deal.


As 3:30 rolled around I hopped in the car in my gym clothes (because that’s what my PLAN was…) and we drove an hour out to pittburgh to run some errands. Would you consider errands an adventure? Maybe not. Would I? Definitely. Especially with this guy and how he knows my personality and uneasiness to spontaneous adventures. He was even surprised I said yes. The car ride filled with discussion about anxiety, perfectionism, societal views on fitness and health, and other  in-depth topics. It’s always great to have someone that you can talk to about more than those “shallow” topics.

After our “quick” errand turned into a  five hour adventure, he dropped me at my car at 9:00PM and I went home; tired, fatigued, and gymless. And I felt entirely okay. I think it was the fact that I really and truly needed that rest day along with a conversation with someone who is willing to talk about more than just protein powder and hair. Off days scare me. I never take a day off, and that is SO critical to training. My off days consist of cardio, which I think is entirely healthy due to the fact that I’m walking, jogging and incorporating some low endurance activity. But there comes a day each week where it really is important to just take a day off: from working out, from dealing with people and relationships, from working, from everything.


Being “okay” with allowing plans to change is something I am working on, and I think it’s a lifelong battle. My friend told me: I’ve learned to be okay with traffic, and waiting in lines. Those are things I can’t control and have to learn to accept.

And the control issue is something I personally struggle with. When I can’t control it, I fixate on the things I can control: how long I run for, the time I run for, the amount I eat, etc.

It’s a battle, but accepting what you can’t control is key to recovery.


Does anyone else fear something that isn’t tangible?